Traveling with Kids

Why travel with children, the research on jet lag, recommended products for travel, and ten tips for traveling with children

Jul 05, 2023

In Paris with my family… the Eiffel Tower was closed due to a strike the only day that we had tickets so we could only take pictures but not actually go anywhere near or up the Eiffel Tower!

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I recently returned from a nearly two-week vacation in France with my family (my children are 7, 5, and almost 3 years old, and I was 31 weeks pregnant on the trip). We visited Paris and Provence in the South of France, which I realize sounds dreamy and magical and it definitely was, but it was also exhausting and full of all of the same sibling fighting and meltdowns that we experience at home (actually maybe even more of this due to jet lag and being out of our routine).

My husband and I love to travel and we have always traveled with our children from literally the first week of being parents. My first child arrived unexpectedly early while we were on vacation and even our drive home from the hospital turned into a 6-hour road trip. Since that early experience, we have not shied away from taking long drives or flights or complicated trips with our children.

But there is no denying that traveling with kids can be challenging to say the least. Unfortunately the research provides us little guidance here (with the exception of some research on jet lag) so today’s newsletter will include both research and my personal experience from traveling with my three kids. This newsletter will include:

Why travel with children
The research on jet leg
The products I have found to make travel easier
Ten tips for traveling with kids

Why Travel with Kids

Many parents wonder before or after a trip whether it is even worth traveling with kids. Research does find some benefits associated with family travel including improved well-being in parents and enhanced skill development in children. Research also finds that travel is associated with improved family bonding and communication. However, these studies are correlational, meaning we don’t know whether travel causes these positive outcomes or is simply associated with it. In addition, it is also highly likely that you would reap the same benefits from a “staycation” that involves quality family time in your hometown if you can’t afford to or don’t want to travel. Therefore, I would advise families to avoid traveling to simply benefit their children. It may only be “worth it” if you as a parent have a true passion for travel and want to pass it on to your children, or if you have another compelling reason to travel such as visiting family or an important cultural experience.

Research on Jet Lag

Jet lag is the experience of fatigue, sleep difficulties, and feeling “out of it” that is associated with traveling to another time zone. Experts suggest that jet lag takes as many days to overcome as 2/3 of the number of time zones crossed (so in going to France, we crossed 6 time zones which means we could expect it to take 4 days to recover from jet lag).

Research finds that jet lag seems to increase with age, suggesting that it may be easier for your children to adjust than it is for you as an adult (although research hasn’t directly compared adults versus children). Jet lag also seems to be worse when traveling to the east rather than traveling west. For example, this means that it would be harder to travel from the US to Europe than Europe to the US. The research on jet lag is limited and mostly involves adults but research does provide some suggestions to help:

Get a lot of light exposure during daytime hours: Be outside in the sun as much as possible during the day. Research finds that exposure to natural light may be the best way to reset your circadian rhythm. Although artificial indoor light has an impact on adjusting your circadian rhythm, it is important to remember that natural outdoor light may three times more powerful at doing so than artificial indoor light.
Avoid artificial light and blue light in the evenings: Similarly, make sure you stay in low light and avoid light from electronics in the evening hours. Blue light from electronics may be extremely disruptive to your circadian rhythm and may suppress your own production of melatonin in the evening
Ask your pediatrician about melatonin: Research in adults finds that melatonin is effective for treating jet lag with a recommended dose of 2 to 5 mg for up to 4 days after travel. However, this research is in adults and we do not know the appropriate dosing for children so be sure to consult with your pediatrician before trying this. See here for an interview with the Pediatrician Mom for more on melatonin.
Keep in mind there may be large individual differences in responding to jet lag: Research finds that different people respond very differently to jet lag even in a controlled lab situation. One of your children may be fine and one may really struggle, or more conceringly your child may be fine and you may really struggle.
Expect some tummy issues and changes in appetite with jet lag: Children (and adults) may experience stomach pain, indigestion, constipation, and loss of appetite with jet lag.

Best Products for Traveling with Children

A lot of us as parents (myself included) address the anticipatory anxiety of traveling with kids by buying products that we hope to make travel easier. Of course, you do not need these products but here are some suggestions for the best products that I have found for keeping children entertained and safe during travel. Because Parenting Translator is a non-profit organization, I can guarantee that these are not sponsored and simply based on my own personal experience:

Miniature Magnetic tiles: These Mini Picasso Tiles are something that I always bring on trips. Picasso Tiles are my kids’ favorite toys at home and the miniature size allows us to easily bring them with us on trips.
Playdoh: I like to bring miniature playdoh kits like these from Young, Wild & Friedman or these from Present Not Perfect. For a better deal, these mini playdoh containers are also easy to throw in a backpack.
Water Wow: These board books are great for toddlers and young preschoolers and can even be refilled on a plane!
Puffy Sticker kits: I love these puffy sticker activity books. There are a lot of different themes, they are reusable, and take up very little space.
Paper and crayons/markers: Of course, it seems so simple but it is hard to beat paper and crayons/markers for keeping children of all ages entertained without taking up too much space.
LCD Writing tablet: This non-electronic tablet allows your child to write and draw and then erase. This item was enjoyed by both my 3-year-old and 7-year-old on our most recent trip.
WikkiStix: These small, thin wax sticks can be molded into many different shapes and used in a lot of creative ways. You can also buy the non-name brand version in bulk on Amazon.
“Travel” Car seat: My kids’ car seats are so heavy and bulky that traveling with them seems impossible. However, I have also found that the car seats provided by rental car companies are often outdated and you never know if they have been damaged in an accident. Instead, I bring a “travel” car seat for any of my kids in convertible car seats. While it is not technically designed for travel, this car seat is lightweight (only 10 pounds), easy to install, and has good reviews. It is also FAA-approved so you can use it to strap your child into the plane seat in the same way you would in a car.
“Travel” booster seat: This wearable vest is extremely compact and lightweight and safe alternative to a booster seat when traveling with your child. It is pretty pricy though so I would only buy it if you plan on traveling a lot with your children.
Portable white noise machine: We always bring these small white noise machines with us on a trip. They can clip onto the carseat or be used to help your child on a plane. They can also be charged with a USB.

Ten Tips for Traveling with Kids

After traveling with my own children for almost 8 years, these are big lessons that I have learned:

Expect something (or everything) to go wrong at least once per day: Travel and children are both very unpredictable and when you combine the two, you can expect something to go wrong or at least not go as planned at least once per day. You can make plans and try to anticipate any challenges you might experience but you can never do so perfectly. I am a Type A planner and I did extensive research to come up with itineraries for us that would be fun for both the children and us as parents. However, my plans often fell through. This is an incredible opportunity to teach your children flexibility when your plans don’t work out. To make it more concrete for children, talk about it in terms of “Plan A” and “Plan B,” “Plan C” etc. If you know they may be disappointed when Plan A falls through, discuss Plan B (and Plan C) in advance so they are prepared for the change in plans and talk about how you will cope with the disappointment. Then model flexibility for them when the situation does arise. Acknowledge that you can be both disappointed Plan A didn’t work out and grateful for a Plan B.
Give yourself a break: Sometimes none of your plans work and your children are all melting down and it seems like a huge disaster. In these moments, I think it is so important to give yourself some grace and remember that it is your first time traveling in this particular situation. Even if it isn’t your first time at the location, it is probably your fist time traveling to that location with children at these particular ages. For example, I learned on our trip that going to a very crowded art museum with a 3-year-old, 5-year-old, and 7-year-old at 4pm on an already packed day was probably a mistake. I could feel bad about the public tantrums or the waste of money on this activity or I could recognize that this was my first time traveling internationally with three young children and I may not have it all figured out yet.
Keep some of your routines and throw out some others: Travel often involves relaxing many of our routines and it can feel nice for both parents and children to relax these routines. However, I find it can be helpful to keep at least a few of your routines in place. For our family, the mealtime routines and “getting ready” in the morning routines often looks different when traveling. However, we almost always keep the bedtime routine in place to the best of our ability (even when it happens later or with all three kids sleeping in the same room). We bring a few paperback books with us and do bath time, books, and songs just like we do at home. We also usually keep the “quiet time”/nap time routine in place. For my toddler this involves an actual afternoon nap and for my 5- and 7-year old this involves listening to audiobooks while coloring or engaging in another quiet activity (which is typically what they do at home while my toddler naps).
Have one goal per day: Before having children a trip may have involved many activities in a day. You could go to a mid-sized city and see all of the sights in one day but with children you really have to adjust your expectations. When we travel with our children, I try to have only one goal per day in terms of an activity or sight to see. It is tempting to want to “do it all” when on vacation but if you have more than one goal you may be setting yourself up for disappointment. You can always try to do more after achieving your daily goal but having low expectations can keep everyone from becoming disappointed.
Find local playgrounds or at least some open space for your children to let off steam: Regardless of the location of your vacation, children sometimes just need a playground or at the very least some natural or open space that allows for gross motor play. One of my favorite tools for travel is an app called Playground Buddy. This free app locates the nearest playgrounds in most locations (including internationally). It also often shows a picture and provides some information on the playground. If your kids (or you) would like to find good hikes or walks nearby another app that I use is called Trailforks. This app allows you to download trail maps for many different regions across the globe which can help you to find hiking and biking trails and avoid getting lost while on the trail.
Try picnics instead of eating out: if you have young children or children who are not used to eating out regularly, picnics (either outside or on the floor of the hotel room) can be a much more manageable (and affordable) option than eating out every meal. I like to visit a local grocery store and pick out an assortment of kid-friendly food such as bread, cheese, and fruit, and then lay out a towel at a local park or the floor of your hotel room. Your kids will think it is fun and you will find it much more relaxing than trying to get them to “behave” in a stuffy restaurant.
Follow their interests: One of the most fascinating aspects of traveling with your kids is seeing what catches their interest and what doesn’t. When you slow down and move at their pace, they have the chance to find what is interesting for them, which will ultimately help them to develop their own love of exploring and travel. It might be observing animals, checking out tacky gift shops, climbing up tall towers to get the best view, or trying ice cream in every city you visit— try to encourage and follow up on whatever they show interest in!
Allow “down time” when needed: Sometimes children are just exhausted or overwhelmed and can’t do any of the planned vacation activities and need downtime or even a “lazy day.” Downtime may be different for every child— it may be watching a movie, reading books, or playing quietly in the hotel room. It can feel like a “waste” of a vacation day for you but it may be very important for them. One day in France I could tell my children were exhausted and as much as I wanted to take advantage of being in a foreign country, they just needed to play with their Magnatiles in the room for a few hours. There was a part of me that wanted to say “You play with Magnatiles every day at home— let’s go out and do something!” but I knew that pushing would only backfire.
Move at their pace not yours: Kids have shorter legs and less stamina than adults. They also naturally move at a slower pace. Embrace this slower pace and try to slow down yourself. Everyone will be much happier if the adults just accept the “kid pace” rather than pushing them to move at our pace.
Work in activities that you enjoy yourself that you can do with your children: Although a lot of your vacation will be shaped around your kids, make sure that you schedule in activities for yourself that make it feel like a “vacation” to you too. For me, I love hiking and most of my vacations before kids involved a lot of hiking so I worked in several kid-friendly hikes into our schedule. It may not have been my kids’ favorite activity but we as parents deserve a vacation too. For you, it may be making sure you have time to read a book while your children play happily on new playgrounds or trying new food while your kids eat bread and cheese from the grocery store. Remember that it is your vacation too and you deserve something that you enjoy as well!

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